Freedom from Technology

Have you ever spent an entire day away from your phone? Better yet, for most of us, spending an hour away from our phone is a true test.

I am, unfortunately, a technology dependent person. I am beyond blessed to get to work from home and take care of JB at the same time. Thanks to wonderful technology, this is possible. However learning to shut it off can be a challenge.

You don't realize how much time is wasted, thinking "Oh, I'll just respond to this quick email." "I've just got to put a reminder in my phone to text _____ later." "Oh, let me call ___ back real quick." All of these little, quick tasks add up, and before I knew it, I've become slave to this tiny iPhone.

The buzzes, beeps, and dings draw me in. I'll come running to see who or what needs my attention.

I didn't realize just how much control this THING had over my life, until I didn't have my phone for 10 days.

In Europe I could use my phone as long as I was connected to wifi, but when I was out on adventures, my phone was simply a camera.

I was forced out into the world, with open eyes. Not eyes glued to a screen, but open eyes to the world around me. How beautiful it was when I finally looked up!

Karlskrona was for me, a liberating experience. I was forced outside of my comfort zone, and forced to wander a city alone. I had to give up my silly, unfound fears and actually live life. I was forced to put away the distraction, and just breathe in the day.

I was in true vacation mode. Unfortunately, Jimmy was in full work mode, having to work a typical work week at the office in Karlskrona.

But finally after my amazing week in Sweden, we were off to Ireland so Jimmy could enjoy some "tech free" down time as well.

We did explore Dublin, but truthfully, if felt too "American." Yes there were traditional pubs on every corner, which is different, and yes everyone spoke with a beautiful accent, however there was a Starbucks, Subway, and KFC everywhere we looked. Dublin is a big city, full of the hustle and fast-paced American lifestyle, that I was seeking refuge from.

I desperately wanted Jimmy to have this freeing feeling of exploring another country, like I had in Sweden. (Ironically, he's the world traveler and this was only the 2nd stamp in my passport.) Anyway, he travels for work so often, he doesn't get out and get to enjoy nature, enjoy a small town in another country. He doesn't get the pleasure of looking up from a screen when he travels. So we took a train to Houth, which is a small seaside town in Ireland.

God truly opened our eyes to the beauty He created there. He showed up mighty ways!

We walked a wall along the ocean, just to watch, hear, and feel the waves crash against the rocks. Then, spontaneously, decided to just hike a mountain. What?! Never in my organized, scheduled down to the minute life, would I have imagined saying "Oh there's a mountain with gorgeous cliffs, want to climb it?"

Praise the Lord, for spectacular moments like this!!

Unfortunately, words don't do this day justice. Pictures, truthfully don't either, but they at least let you somewhat experience the beauty we saw.

I must apologize for being a bit hypocritical here. I realize that in order for you to be reading this post, you have to be using some form of technology, but indulge me for a second. Let's imagine for a moment, that you are escaping reality for a brief second to share in this beauty with me.

  This seriously looks like a stairway to heaven! This was part of the hike ...

 Someone's yard on the side of the mountain

 We got to a plateau that I thought was close to the top, and had my breath seriously taken away. I couldn't think or say anything, but "Praise God!"

 ....

 This was the mountain we climbed. This shot doesn't show how beautiful and tall it really was!

 Climbing ...

 Still climbing ....

And then the following are pictures around Dublin, including the gorgeous Saint Patrick's Cathedral ...

 Saint Patrick's Cathedral

 There was a big, beautiful park in the middle of Dublin. We had a great time getting lost, wandering around.

 We walked over the river and tried to figure out what this really pretty building was but couldn't figure it out. 

 Gorgeous day to visit Saint Patrick's.

 Jimmy laughs, but I love doors! The doors on this church were beautiful so I had to capture them.

 Saint Patrick's Cathedral

Beautiful stained glass windows inside Saint Patrick's Cathedral.

I challenge you to turn off the technology today! Open your eyes to the world around you, you'd amazed at the beauty you're missing!

Finding Myself in Sweden

My husband Jimmy works for an international company. With that comes a bit a travel. Thankfully, not nearly as much as it could be, but he does have to go to Sweden every now and then.

He found out he had to travel to Karlskrona, Sweden for a few days and at the last minute was encouraged to bring me, take a few days off and travel other parts of Europe.

Both of us had never been to Ireland so decided that was a must see. More on that in a future post...

Luckily I didn't have much longer than a week to make a decision, make arrangements, pack and board the plane. Had I had much longer to think, I have a feeling my sadness over leaving JB would have caused me to back out.

After a very tearful goodbye, I watched my sweet one year old drive away with Mimi and Grandaddy (My parents.) I must add that the only tears were from Daddy and Mommy, JB could not have been more thrilled to spend time with his grandparents!

I have to admit that I have always been a very fearful person. I worry that the person walking past my car in the Wal-Mart parking lot wants to jump in and kidnap us, or that the noise downstairs is certainly a burglar breaking in. Don't get me started on the fears of random diseases I contract simply from watching Grey's Anatomy! My poor sweet husband! These are completely unfounded and ridiculous fears, I know. But traveling to a foreign country for the first time, wow! You can imagine what my fears were like!

Jimmy had to work the first few days we were there, so I was left alone in this strange city. That first morning, I just knew I'd sit in the hotel room all day crying over JB and want to go home!

Thankfully, Jimmy and a man from the Karlskrona office had arranged for his wife and I to meet. They were originally from Italy and had lived in Sweden for a little over a year. Elisabetta was learning English and was so sweet to take an hour or 2 out of her day each morning to show me around Karlskrona. She is one of the sweetest, and most amazing souls I have ever met. She showed me all about living in Sweden, and I even went with her to pick up her girls from school one day, so I got to see inside the Swedish Education system. The nerdy teacher in me was thrilled!

I got to see the "non-touristy" parts of the city, and really experience Swedish culture. She would then drop me off at random points and I got to wander museums, shops, coffee houses, and much more all on my own! Talk about a break through for me!

I rented a bike and rode around the city, I climbed a famous rock in the middle of the sea and got amazing pictures, I toured historic museums and houses, and ALL ON MY OWN! Talk about a liberating experience. I felt like I was truly living for the first time in years. I trusted God to take care of me and left the worries back in the States.

What an experience! See some of my adventures below...

 This is the side of the rock I climbed. I had such a wonderful time sitting on this bench, praying and taking pictures. Talk about a perfect time to praise our Creator!

 The view from our hotel! 

 An interesting thing about Karlskrona, is that it is an archipelago, so many people had boats to get from island to island instead of cars.

 More boat pictures ...

And the City Center, talk about beautiful history! I had such a great time exploring and taking pictures of these buildings and churches!

Sweet D!

D was a precious baby who was in my class in Raleigh. D struggled with harder situations than I've ever fathomed and all at the age of 6. He is a better father and caretaker to his 5 year old brother than many "parents" are as adults. All D wanted was a forever family to love him.Sweet D needed to know that regardless of how many mommies, daddies, and places he lived in his life someone was always going to be there.

The week before school began, D's mother decided that she just couldn't do it anymore. So she made the decision to take D and his younger brother (5 years old) to Social Services and simply gave them up. D and his little brother were placed in a temporary foster care situation. Someone decided that their mom should still have visitation rights, so each Thursday morning before school they went for visitation. D and his brother would sit in the playroom watching the door waiting for mom to come in. They sat there for the full hour and Mom would never show. After that brutally disappointing hour they were then rushed off to school. Can you imagine facing that type of disappoint on a weekly basis and then being expected to jump to work and function normally? No adult I know could do that, yet a 5 and 6 year old were expected to. This went on for months, and then finally in January of that year we got the best news ever, a wonderful couple decided they would like to adopt both boys. We worked with psychologist, social workers, and many other people and told the boys that their mom would always love them and be their mom, but they were so lucky they were getting another mommy and daddy. "That means I'll have three mommies," exclaimed D. Mrs. Lekovich is my school mommy, my real mommy and now this new mommy. Now excited as he may have been at first this was a tough road. D had developed some bad habits. In order to get fed with his real mom he had to lay on the floor and throw a temper tantrum until she got up and fed them. So D's way of expressing a need was to have a fit. In his new home, his new parents were working hard to break him of these habits. This was a trying time with plenty of ups and downs, but the boys began to realize that like we all promised them, "this was their forever family who loved them and would never leave them."

The week before school got out for summer, something drastic happened yet again in sweet D's life that no child should ever experience, he lost another "forever family," when the boys were ripped from this home due to miscommunication about discipline policies prior to the adoption becoming legal. This was the last week of school, the boys were being thrown back into the foster care system. We had no clue where they would be pleased, and because of privacy laws, I had no way of finding out where he'd go to school or any way of keeping in touch with him.

My allotted time to influence his life was up. For my 180 days I was his only constant, his punching bag, confidant, friend, enemy at times (as he saw it), his "school mommy." But even I, with all the good intentions, am human and would ultimately fail him. He needed to know that there was someone who loved him before he was even born, and no matter what happens to him will always love him, and that is Jesus. I pulled him aside and let him know the truth of Jesus' love for him, and pray daily he never forgets. D is an amazing young man and even though I have no way of ever finding him again, I hope he is somewhere with people who teach him about his heavenly daddy and he grows into the man he was created to be.

I haven't shared sweet D's story with many people for a few reasons, but mainly one. Fear of doing the wrong thing, according to my North Carolina teaching license. The wrong thing, HA, even typing the words makes my blood boil with anger. It is considered wrong to love a child and let them know there is a heavenly father who will never forsake them. It is wrong to pray with a child in school. It is wrong to give them hope when everything else in their world is a shaky, horrible mess. It is wrong to give them a small glimmer of hope, when the rest of the world has walked out on them. "But you teach in a public school, You shouldn't inflict your beliefs on someone else, you don't know what his family's beliefs are, and you might OFFEND someone." I could hear all the naysayers.  Truth be told this little boy was yet again an orphan to be passed around in the system. There wasn't anyone for him to call family, anyone to go home to, anyone to get a hug from at the end of the day, anyone who knew the heart of this little boy and what made him tick, anyone to OFFEND, anyone to inflict their beliefs into this young soul, and so I felt, knew, it was my calling. But still, I was scared of the repercussions of my actions. However, I would much rather pay the price to a state or school board, than to my Savior one day.

So I took D outside, sat at a picnic table and told him all about Jesus. I told him that he was going to have a lot of hurt in his life. I told him that adults make mistakes because we are human. However, there is someone who created D and loved him before he was even born. I told him no matter what home he lived in, no matter where he ended up Jesus was always with him and lived in his heart.

I pray D never forgets out conversation. I think about him constantly and know that God has him in his arms and will deliver him from all the pain he's been through.

Wherever you are sweet D, remember your school mommy will always love you, and will always be here praying for you, wherever you are.

Where did the year go?

I've been hesitant to write because the OCD side of me can't stand not writing things in order. That would be why my first post is about what's happened since we got married. HA! As a work at home mommy of a very active "almost toddler" there's not enough time in the day to catch up on what happened. We are full steam ahead, so with that in mind ....

My baby is 11 months old! When he was born several people told me don't blink, they'll be grown before you know it. Listening careful to those instructions, I swear I haven't blinked in (almost) a year but somehow time has flown!

This little man brings so much joy to our lives, I simply can't put it into words. He is the happiest person I have ever known, and never meets a stranger. He smiles, waves, and even reaches out to touch anyone he meets. I must admit he gets his smile from his daddy and I couldn't be more thrilled! Before he was born we would dream of what he'd look like, but the one thing I kept saying was "I hope he gets Jimmy's smile," and he certainly did!

His favorite game right now is hybrid between peek a boo and hide and go seek. He loves when I crawl ahead of him and hide behind corners and jump out and yell "Boo!" He squeals turns and "speed crawls" in the other direction to find the next hiding spot. His clever self has begun hiding as well. It is precious. He gets where he can't see us and thinks that means we can't see those chubby legs. I love these fun moments with my sweet boy. Trying to take his 11 month picture turned into a game of hide and seek behind a chair. This made for some cute pictures!

This is his hiding pose, notice the lowered head, he thinks he's hiding! Sweet boy!

Mommy can't see me ....

Here I am!!!

I swear I love this little guy to the moon and back!!

Rewind

     Well I began blogging shortly after Jimmy and I were married, as life would have it, I posted maybe twice, possibly three attempts, and then stopped. The blog title was "the end of goodbyes" because Jimmy and I had been in a long distance relationship for 2 1/2 years prior to our wedding. Those years were filled with many unbelievably difficult Sundays which always brought about "goodbye." 

While we were dating and engaged I can remember drinking as much caffeine as possible on Saturday nights because I couldn't bare the thought of going to sleep only to wake and have to say goodbye the next morning. I HATED falling asleep, I wanted to soak up each possible moment. Still on weekends I find myself struggling with this same mindset of having to stay awake. (And now with a 13 week old baby, that isn't exactly easy!)

    However, God used those times to prepare, shape, and grow our love for each other. We learned valuable communication skills, seeing as we had to communicate by phone for so long. There were also personal lessons which we had to learn during this time as well. It was here when I began looking back through my prayer journals and realized you could see God writing my story! I had to learn to turn over the pen, and allow the maker to write my story instead of telling Him what I thought He should write. I am incredibly grateful to serve a  God who is all-knowing and works all things for our good! 

    On the flight back from our honeymoon I was ecstatic it was the first time in almost 3 years there would be no tears on the ride home! The thought still baffles me! And after 3 years of marriage the fact that I get to see his face each night and morning is still thrilling! We make the choice to never get accustomed to seeing each other and to marvel in the blessing it is just to see each other's face each day! Never take even one day for granted!

     And so it continues, our journey as husband and wife ... 

I made the move and joined my husband in Raleigh NC. We lived in a cute, cozy one bed/one bathroom apartment. We absolutely loved every minute getting to know each other in this new relationship! In October of 2011 we traveled for our first trip as a married couple to Chicago for Jimmy's cousin's wedding. We had a blast! This was a picture from the bean.

God had been working in my heart that He needed and wanted me to work with impoverished children for a while. So when I moved to Raleigh I began teaching at a school which served a particular neighborhood in Raleigh which had previously been bused to keep socio-economic status equal throughout schools. It was here that God placed D in my life....